I’m so alone with it
would like to exchange ideas
with other A patients
encourage them not to be
ashamed  feel guilty or stupid

I know more than I
seem to know   hard to express
A is maybe not a killer
but it is a maimer

there are still things I can do
laughing is absolutely fantastic
jazz is my constant friend
makes me feel on top of the world

so many fears  the dark           
not using the right words
tripping on the stairs  forgetting
worst fear  going to a nursing home

being dense is a large part of having A
clarity comes in fits and starts
I always feel a little bit behind  
it’s a very dull life

I miss being important
a participant not an onlooker
I can never be what I once was
that’s hard   it’s living halfway

                       Loraine Brink